Until This Is Over - Bit 8

Story Course

This post is the eighth in the Story Course series. If you just subscribed or just discovered this post, please start with the first post.

Here’s my close reading inventory

Things are happening fast now, and the tension is wound tightly, so let’s jump into the inventory right away.

Here’s what I noticed and wondered about in the seventh bit

“He twisted quickly in his chair to avoid her touch, grabbed her wrist and squeezed — hard — then slowly released her.”

There are several things to notice here. First, Scotty avoids her touch. Is this just a natural response to “tickling,” or does it tell us something about his personality — or his psychopathy? Second, he grabs her and squeezes her hard. Is it aggression? Is it awkward playfulness and he doesn’t know that he’s hurting her? Third, there’s a slow release. It feels like taunting — or torture. Or perhaps it’s just him calming himself from an overly physical response to her teasing.

Scotty tells Teresa “Yeah, you’re kind of looking for trouble.” I can read this as flirting or as a threat. How do you read it?

There’s this exchange about the sirens that are now on the street behind Teresa’s house. She says “…I thought you said you were on the next street over.” He says “No.” She says “I swear you did.” He responds “No. I’m on Acacia. It’s farther.” We can feel the doubt, possibly suspicion, beginning to grow in Teresa’s mind. It’s a classic he said / she said, and neither one of them can prove what was said earlier. Interestingly, however, we can. It’s on the page, and we can go back and read what he said. Did you go back and look? If so, how did it affect what you’re thinking?

Despite the sirens, Teresa wants to order food. Scotty wants to leave. She’s behaving casually, comfortably, as his behavior grows more agitated. Is he afraid? If so, of what? Getting hurt? Being trapped? Getting caught?

In the exposition, it was quiet and nobody was around. Now there are sirens and helicopters. Maybe nobody was outside because of whatever happened in the neighborhood. If that’s the case, why is Scotty out?

And what, exactly, is up with the sirens?

And here’s what I’m feeling

Teresa says “This is freaky.” Yes, Teresa, it is. Something has happened (again?) and it’s raised my discomfort considerably. There are sirens and helicopters, so it’s serious. My Suspicion / Trust meter is whipping back and forth, changing almost by the line.

These things make me suspect Scotty:

• He walks into a stranger’s house

• Fiddles with the box cutter

• Has a cut on his side

• Box cutter disappears

• Misleads her about where he lives (or does he?)

• Grabs her wrist hard

On the other hand, these things make me trust him:

• Helps her unload furniture

• Tells a white lie to make her feel better

I don’t know what to make of his reaction to the sirens and helicopters. He seems concerned, but there could be any number of plausible reasons for that, some of them innocent, others sinister.

The last bit we read ended with “She turned back and he was gone.” Let’s pick it up from there for the eighth bit of Until This Is Over.

“Scotty?” she called out. There was no response, nothing but silence for a moment, then she heard a door close. She stepped quickly into the front room and he was standing there, peering through the blinds out onto the street.

“I thought you left,” she said. He didn’t turn but held his eyes on the street. “Is something wrong?”

“No. I don’t know. I’m just trying to figure out what’s going on.”

“It must be big, with police and helicopters, right?”

“Seems like it.”

“I’m going to see if there’s anything on the news.” She walked back into the kitchen and turned up the volume on the little television. She flipped through the channels, then again. Finding nothing, she walked back out to the front room. He was still at the window, but crouching now, looking up through the blinds toward the sky.

“Can you see the helicopter?”

“No. Trees are in the way.”

She watched him scan the sky for a moment. “Listen,” she said. “Do you need to get home?” He didn’t answer. “Maybe you need to get home?” He stood, turned from the window toward her. The helicopter grew louder again. She crossed her arms over her chest, wrapped her outstretched fingers across her ribs. “Because if you don’t, I wouldn’t mind you sticking around for a while. Until this is over, you know?”

He nodded slowly, squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed them vigorously, then blinked several times and gave a quick shake of his head. He looked at her and waited for the thumping of the helicopter to trail away. “Sure,” he said. “I’ve got no place I should be.”

That’s the end of the story.

But it’s not the end of Story Course. We still have some work to do, unpacking all of the things we noticed and wondered about and felt, and we should revisit Chekhov’s gun and Freytag’s Pyramid and whatever else is on your mind. Let me know in the comments what you’re thinking.

When you’re ready, here’s the link to the next post.